I used to think that I was the only one with bad luck when it came to lawnmowers.
Mine had to go to the shop for a couple of days and it has been there for four weeks waiting for John Deere to authorize a free engine.
My grass was getting deep. Strangers were stopping by and asking if it would be alright with me if they went on Safari in my yard.
Then came John to the rescue. He came with his truck, his trailer, his push mower and his riding mower. But he also came with my Mow Man luck.
His push mower would not start. His riding mower had to have a jump start Then he had to tighten something under the cutting deck. Then the belt that turned the blades broke.
He came up to the porch to say goodbye and on his way back to his truck he fell into a hole and went to his knees. He looked like he was only three feet tall. Poor John.
He went home and bought a new belt and attempted to cut his neighbors yard and then a part of the cutting deck fell off.
However pitiful it was, he tried. Lord bless him. Thanks John and welcome to the Mow Man club.
Yesterday I was dressing for the trip to Sunday School and Church.
It became clear to me that almost every tie I chose to match my suit had a stain somewhere on the tie.
My wife is always on my case about spilling food on my ties when we are eating out together.
Usually, she takes them to the dry-cleaners........when I give them to her.....but, most of the time, I forget.
That leaves me with a closet full of ties that have small amounts of gravy, peas, salad, juice, butter (did I tell you how much I love butter ?) and other wonderful buffet items, all over them.
What is a man to do ?
I found the answer. No more smells, no more mold (green and blue and yellow, ect.) No more having Poopsie giving me "down the road".
The answer.........
Gentlemen, as soon as you get home, take off the tie and hang it in the refrigerator.
THIS IS A PICTURE OF FOUR OF THE BOYS IN MY SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS. THREE WERE OUT SICK.
HERE WE HAVE BRANDON AND BEN ON THE FRONT ROW AND JORDON AND KENDALL ON THE BACK ROW.
THE LESSON THAT I BROUGHT WAS FROM I SAMUEL.
THE ARMIES WERE LINED UP ON BOTH SIDES. MEN WERE BUILDING UP THEIR COURAGE BY SCREAMING AND POUNDING THEIR SWORDS AND SPEARS UPON THEIR SHIELDS. ARROWS BEGAN TO FLY THROUGH THE AIR UNTIL THE SUN WAS DARKENED. THE ARROWS FELL AND HIT THEIR MARK. MEN AND ANIMALS FELL TO THE EARTH, CRYING OUT IN PAIN. SOLDIERS FOUGHT HAND TO HAND WITH DOUBLE EDGED SWORDS AND ARMS AND HANDS WERE CUT FROM VICTIMS BODIES. BLOOD SPRAYED LIKE WATER FROM A GARDEN HOSE. MEN PRAYED TO DIE. (AND THAT WAS ONLY THE FIRST VERSE)
THE MORNING SERVICE WAS WONDERFUL AND A NEW FAMILY JOINED OUR CHURCH.
HARRISON CAME HOME WITH US.
HE WANTED TO EAT LUNCH AT THE "ASIAN BUFFETT" MAW-MAW TOLD HIM THAT THE CHICKEN ON A STICK WAS ACTUALLY A "CAT LEG". HE HAD NOT BEEN HOME TOO LONG LAST NIGHT UNTIL WE GOT A PHONE CALL FROM KRISTI. SHE WANTED TO KNOW JUST WHAT IT WAS HE ATE FOR LUNCH.
I DID THE ONLY THING A PAW-PAW IN HIS RIGHT MIND COULD DO...... I BLAMED IT ALL ON MAW-MAW.
WHILE AT LUNCH, I SPIED ANOTHER COUPLE FROM CHURCH. BRENDA AND CLIFFORD.
CLIFFORD SAID THAT SHE HAD A BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY. HE SAID THAT SHE HAD TURNED "51" (LIE) I TOLD HER THAT SHE DID NOT look 51, and then......
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A WOMAN SNEAR WITH FOOD SQUIRTING OUT OF BOTH SIDES OF HER MOUTH? (HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENDA-41)
AFTER A VERY SHORT NAP, WE HEADED BACK FOR MORE.
I MUST SAY, THE WHOLE DAY WAS A SPIRITUAL JET RIDE.
WHEN I WALKED INTO THE LOBBY, I RAN ACROSS THE PATH OF ONE OF THE FINEST GUITAR PLAYERS THAT I HAVE EVER HEARD. HE PLAYED CHORDS I HAD NEVER HEARD BEFORE.
HIS NAME IS DARRYL WEAVER. HE IS FROM GEORGIA AND HAD STOPPED BY OUR CHURCH FOR THE EVENING SERVICE.
THE SPIRIT OF GOD WAS ALL OVER HIS SINGING AND PLAYING.
SEVERAL NUMBERS AND IT JUST GOT BETTER.
THE ADULT CHOIR SANG AND THE USHERS TOOK UP THE OFFERING.
ANNOUNCEMENTS WERE MADE AND (PUT YOUR SEAT-BELTS ON) HERE CAME THE FAITH YOUTH CHOIR.
IT WAS A WONDERFUL DAY ALL WAY AROUND. PREACHER GOODMAN NEVER LOST AN OPPORTUNITY TO BRING OUT THE SCRIPTURE AND EXPOUND ON IT.
I CAME HOME AND COULD NOT BELIEVE THE LIFTING SPIRIT THAT I HAD BROUGHT BACK WITH ME.
I am the husband, of 43 years, to my wife, Janice. I'm a retired police officer, play and teach the trumpet in my church orchestra, teach the fourth and fifth grade boys Sunday School class, take dialysis three days a week, and spend the rest of my time being a grandfather. To my own Grandchildren and to every other child in our church, I am simply....Paw Paw.
